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It Is Christmas Again (2016)

Written by Shirley Medlin Pace

Shirley Medlin Pace @1960sparkey
From The Book... The House That Mike Built
It is Christmas Again (2016)

It's been 33 years since death swallowed my son...
Took my joy and happiness...
Filled every waking moment...
Was my bedfellow at night...
Made me want to die.

He would be 56 years old...
He would be receiving AARP material...
He would have grown children...
I would be a grandmother...

My husband died 4 years ago...
After 53 years of marriage...

Now I am alone in the house that Mike built...
But sometimes I feel them both here...

Mike made Christmas such a joy in our home.
He put himself in charge of Christmas.
There were certain things we ALWAYS did.
He and I always wrapped the presents together,
while listening to "Sweet Holy Spirit,"
a song by two teenage girls.
Over and over and over...

When he got his first job, he started playing Santa to his Daddy and me.
He wrapped each present separately. He had the most fun.
One year he had a BROOM for me. I said, "Mike, I KNOW what this present is."

He laughed and said, "Yeah, but you don't know what color."
He made a rule... We could each open ONE present at midnight on
Christmas Eve...
Not one minute before...
Others had to wait.

He always helped me decorate the tree,
And always mumbled about the lights being tangled...
declaring that the next year they would be straight.

I did not put up a tree for two years after he died.
The 3rd year I found them packed all straight.
So many wonderful memories.

When my son died...
I felt I couldn't stand it...
If he was really dead...
I just couldn't stand it.

I was a hopeless case for three very long years.
No one knew what to do with me ...
I didn't know what to do with myself.

GOD'S Word was my lifeline. When I was saved,
God gave me a love for His Word. I had his words
hidden deep in my heart.

The sad thing is I let Mike's death cover them up for awhile.
I knew I had to do something or I was going crazy. One day
I remembered what Mike had said to me on a day when I
was sorta down and out. He said, "Mama, have you prayed
to God today. He will make you strong." He was fifteen.

I reached for the Bible and started looking up everything
pertaining to heaven, as that was my son's home now.
My eyes fell on one particular verse: Psalms 30:5 KJV
"Weeping may endure for a night..."

My weeping had endured for many nights...
I want to say, "You learn to live with grief."
That does not mean you cannot have joy in
your life.

Morning Has Come For Me. It has brought JOY!

I Absolutely adored my son...
I loved him beyond words...
And...

I miss him every day of my life.
EVERY TIME I hear "Sweet Holy Spirit," I tear up...
Now when I put the lights on the Christmas tree...
I smile! Whenever I see a broom... I smile!

I will not open a gift until midnight on Christmas Eve...
And then, Just One! It will soon be Christmas...
Each Christmas brings me closer to those who have already gone home.
I thank God for the gift of His Son...
And...
I thank Him for my son...

I thank him for lifting the veil of death from me
and putting Joy back into my heart.

As I write...
sometimes I feel a tear but most of the time
I'm smiling. God is good! For you see, I did
not share with you the best part of that verse...
The part that I carry in my heart...
It comes after the weeping...

"Joy Cometh In The Morning"

I pray you are not only filled with the spirit of
Christmas, But as God so loved the world that
He gave His Only Son, I pray that you have
received God's Gift and in return, and you
have given your heart to the Risen Savior.
And may I just close with...
Merry Christmas to YOU...

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